THE TRUTH ABOUT TRUTH:

All truth passes through three stages.
First, it is ridiculed.
Second, it is violently opposed.
Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.



Sunday, November 18, 2012

A New American Game Show: 'WHO BE BLACKER THAN THE PREZ?'

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“Hey, do it, now! . . . ”
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Yo, Dogg, my bro ‘n’ homeboy Nappy and me be hangin’ at the pad today, drinkin’ brews and talkin’ shit ‘bout the good ol’ daze.
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We be axin’ each other, “Does you remem'er this?” and “Does you remem'er that?” Then I axed Nappy if he liked this certain song from 1976, and he say he always be diggin’ that jam, man.
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I be surprised like a mofo, ‘cause I din’t think Whitey Nappy be Black enuf to be gettin’ on down with his bad self to such a funky Black-wannabe band from Steubenville, Ohio. 
(Shee-it! How White ya gotta be to live in a town called Steubenville? Might’s well be called “Crackerburg”.)
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But we done brought da tune up on YouTube, Dogg, an’ to my utter ‘mazement, Brother Nappy started “dancin' and singin' and movin' to the groovin'.” And just then it hit me... 
Oh, das right! Once upon a time, me an’ Nappy wuz the only White boys on-a otherwise all-Black baseball team, an' we never even noticed that we wuz mi-nor-i-ties
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So, anyway, like, we wuz diggin’ the tune an’ shit, and then I suddenly got this genius idea. I remembered back to how Prezduhdent Barack Obama looked all girlie ‘n’ shit when he be throwin’ out the first pitch at baseball games:
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Raw Video: Obama Throws Out First Pitch
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And daz when I thought: That punk ain’t Black at all!  Shit, I know lotsa White boys who be Blacker’n the Prez!
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That’s when I come up with my funny funky idea for a new American game show. I mean, there be lotsa famous game shows before. Y’all remem'er these? :
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But now I be all proposin’ ‘n’ shit that we have a new game show called ‘WHO BE BLACKER THAN THE PREZ?’
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It’s really eazy. All ya gotta do is say that this dude or that dude be “Blacker than the prez”, and as long as the dude you name ain’t really Black, you finnin’ tuh be a winner! This game gon’ have LOTSA WINNERS ‘cause we don’ wanna be dis’in’ no mofo’s self-esteem ‘n’ shit. Ya dig? It’z all good, Bro!
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So, go ‘head, Dogg, an’ tell me who you think be BLACKER THAN THE PREZ.
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I’m-a get the game started by sayin’ . . . “WILD CHERRY - those White boys from Steubenville, Ohio – they be Blacker than the Prez.” :
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Wild Cherry - Play That Funky Music
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Now it’s yo' turn, Dogg! Who be Blacker Than The Prez? 
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“Hey, do it, now! . . . ”
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~ Stephen T. McCarthy 
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YE OLDE COMMENT POLICY: All comments, pro and con, are welcome. However, ad hominem attacks and disrespectful epithets will not be tolerated (read: "posted"). After all, this isn’t Amazon.com, so I don’t have to put up with that kind of bovine excrement.
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21 comments:

  1. ooh, I be lovin dis game. Tey be prizes? Dis white boy be blacker tan te prez. One, two, tree he fok up dem veggies wid de slap chop.

    But, dis blonde gil don know how to link to de you tube in dis here box. Yo do it fur me?

    Go to de youtube, it be at 'Virgin Islands Slap Chop V.I. 2012'

    Tis fooker be funn-ee. You no see dis face, he be black island boy. Blacker than de Pres fo sure.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LMr7_zcqXAo&playnext=1&list=PL67B4981651F54BD0&feature=results_video

    ReplyDelete
  2. Ah-Ha!-Ha!-Ha!
    "Hey now!", that White boy be Blacker'n a muhthuf**ker! He not only Blacker den dey Prez, that Whitey be Blacker'n James Brown when he be feelin' GOOD!

    FarAwayEyes, you BIG WINNER!
    Dat be some funny chit, man!

    [Thanks for making me Laugh Out Loud - literally, and several times - jus' befo' dis White boy gotta go to work on a dreary-ass Monday mourning. You a cool chick; you hot like Nitroglycerin!]

    ~ D-FensDogg
    'Loyal American Underground'

    ReplyDelete
  3. Stephen-

    What is a pad, bro?

    Sheee-it! Duz you mean you wuz hanging out in yo' crib?


    "Because some folks is even whiter than me
    Some folks is even blacker than me
    I got myself caught in the middle somewhere
    And that's just where I want to be"


    -Todd Rundgren

    DiscDude from the 'hood

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wild Cherry's Funky Music will be fooling generations to come. Well, maybe those without access to YouTube, anyway.

    I can't compete with SlapChop so I'll go for quantity rather than quality, and stick with the entertainment industry so i don't fry too many brain cells.

    I'll start with the classic DJ Howlin' Robert Weston Smith, who also had that hit "I Ain't Never Seen A WHITE Man".

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99z-H_NEccU&feature=related

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AWgY4JIkenI

    DJ Little Steven. Not Little Steven from E-Street Band, but the Underground Garage Radio Little Steven. Maybe they are the same person. Those Italians all look alike to me.
    Not sure if being Italian disqualifies him or not.
    http://undergroundgarage.com/little-steven-van-zandt/little-steven-biography.html

    The only band I can think of that compares to Wild Cherry might be Humble Pie's 30 Days in The Hole.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdXjm8pZMws&feature=related

    And a personal favorite, Tony Joe WHITE with his Poke Salad Annie.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRF24LY5pvw

    I'll even throw in Mr. Bentley from the Jeffersons and Dana Plato from Different Strokes just to give Obama a chance.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qw9oX-kZ_9k

    SigToo

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  5. FAE's submission is hilarious. I laughed out loud many times during that vid.

    I will say little about my submission, letting it speak for itself:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WuaJz-UbB9Y

    ReplyDelete
  6. "DIRTY LARRY" (a.k.a. DiscConnected) ~

    >> . . . Sheee-it! Duz you mean you wuz hanging out in yo' crib?

    "What'd you say, honky, suhkuh, pig-head, jive-turkey fool?"
    [Google: 'Hollywood Shuffle'.]

    My "crib"?

    I may cry, but I ain't no baby, bitch!

    ~ D-FensDogg
    'Loyal American Underground'

    ReplyDelete
  7. Hey white boyz - how 'bout some clicky links?

    ReplyDelete
  8. SUPER-SIG ALSO ~

    >> . . . I'll start with the classic DJ Howlin' Robert Weston Smith: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99z-H_NEccU&feature=related

    DING!-DING!-DING!
    You Big Winnah! Even if you hadn't posted nuttin' else, that alone make you Big Winnah!

    Freakin' Wolfman, man! Classic!

    Ya know, the last sentence of my review for G. Edward Griffin's essential book, 'The Creature From Jekyll Island', was this:

    "Read it now or the Wolfman's gonna getcha!"

    That was a direct quote from 'American Graffiti' (unquestionably one of my all-time very favorite movies). Shortly after that scene you posted the URL to, Wolfman Jack, via the radio, told the blonde in the T-bird (Suzanne Somers) she had better call his friend, Kurt, at that phone booth... "or the Wolfman's gonna getcha!"

    And of course the blonde did exactly what that "big Black Wolfman" told her to do. CLASSIC STUFFS, man!

    >> . . . Those Italians all look alike to me.

    HA!-HA! How politically incorrect! I should ban you from this blog - but I think you'll receive a big trophy instead.

    However, that "Little Steven" is indeed the same Little Steven from the E-Street Band. Furthermore, I suspect him of being a closet homosexual. That notwithstanding, he's STILL Blacker than the prez (even if he MIGHT BE Obama's closet lover).

    >> . . . Humble Pie's 30 Days in The Hole: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sdXjm8pZMws&feature=related

    Eh... Sometimes ya gotta listen with yer eyes closed and axe yerself: "Would I think this dude be Black?"

    In my opinion (which is only one opinion, and there ain't no King, President, or Dictator here), Humble Pie's song sounds too much like a Rolling Stones song. In other words: White Boys playin' "Black".

    >> . . . Tony Joe WHITE with his Poke Salad Annie: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fRF24LY5pvw

    DING!-DING!-DING!

    I knew the song, but I didn't know THIS recording of it. With my eyes closed, I heard muhself sayin', "Thus muhthufuhkuh be Blacker'n a muhthufuhkuh!"

    Mark twain fer Super-Sig Also!

    Incidentally, Bro, 'spect me to get 'BLACKlisted By History' "in the mail" this coming Saturday. (If it wuz a check, it would take much longer!)

    ~ D-FensDogg
    'Loyal American Underground'

    ReplyDelete
  9. SHEBOYGANBOY SIX ~

    ALLAH'S UNHOLY TROUSERS!!!

    Oh, shit, man, I hardly know what to type! I'm STILL laughing, and I MEAN THAT!

    Oh, Geez, I spent 7 or 8 years working in Hollyweird, and I still NEVAH saw anything THAT "gay". (Well, actually, believe it or not, fairly close. But that's still the "sweetest" thing I ever saw!)

    Alright, trying to close my mouth now and collect my thoughts, I gotta say there's only one of two possible explanations for that:

    That is either A) the rainbowest homo I ever saw, or B) that dude's gonna be a household-name comedian in a couple years.

    I can still remember when Andy Kaufman (dug him then, dig him still) first hit the scene - I was lucky enough to catch his very first national appearances. I think I even saw his very first TV performance, because I remember him doing these incredibly bad celebrity impersonations and thinking to myself: 'WTF?!'

    And then he launched into his Elvis Presley impersonation and I thought: 'Ahh! A freakin' comedic genius!'

    So, I watched that video you directed me to and I thought: Is this guy REALLY the rainbowest homo I ever saw? Or is he the next Andy Kaufman?

    God knows I hope it's the latter!

    ~ D-FensDogg
    'Loyal American Underground'

    ReplyDelete
  10. HOMEBOYZ 'N' HOMEGIRLZ ~

    One of the great things ‘bout the game show ‘WHO BE BLACKER THAN THE PREZ?’ iz dat ever’one be invited, encouraged, and enfunkshunated to contribute mo’ than one non-Black person who be Blacker’n the Prez!

    Das right! You can come back here over an’ over ‘gain, an’ say mo’ an’ mo’ shit! It’z like a ‘All-You-Be-Able-To-Eat BAR-B-QUE!’ We be servin’ dis shit up all-fuhkhin’-day, Dogg!

    An’ jus’ to prove it can be dun, I’m-a serve up muh own second-helpin’ of a dude what be Blacker than the Prez! An’ dis time (jus’ so FAE don’t be feelin’ too far away), I’m-a do it by makin’ my URL into a muhthuhfuhkin’ link, Dogg!

    Fer muh second submission, I give you the Christian preacher-man Jesse Duplantis who, fo’ a White man, be Blacker’n a black-eyed pea! He be Blacker than Obama and funnier’n shit!

    It be decades ago that my Pa learned me ‘bout Jesse Duplantis. An’ I say it loud: I’m Black and I’m proud that I once saw Jesse Duplantis preach a sermon three blocks from my Phoenix pad… crib… whatevah! Anyway, I saw Black Jesse preach in Phoenix, the Whitest town in the U.S.A. (‘cept maybe fer Bakersfield).

    Click the title, Homies: Jesse Duplantis On TBN

    ~ D-FensDogg
    ‘Loyal American Underground’

    ReplyDelete
  11. ANONYMOUS ~
    Howdy. And Adios.

    (Don't be shy.
    Y'all come again now, hear?)

    ~ D-FensDogg
    'Loyal American Underground'

    ReplyDelete
  12. "Read it now or the Wolfman's gonna getcha!"
    Makes me wonder how many additional copies of "The Creature From Jekyll Island" were sold after potential buyers read your review. 412 of 431 (or 95%) found it helpful. I guess that's why there is one sitting on my shelf, although it was bought at Barnes & Noble.

    Here's your re-post of that review. (I'm also checking if I could make a "clicky link" in blogger comments.)
    SJM's Creature Review

    ReplyDelete
  13. You did not comment on whether my previous submission was a good one in regard to the question posed by the blog, and you did not deem me a "winner" as you did some other submissions.

    So, I'll take your suggestion and submit another one. Although the next video is shot as point-of-view, I believe the person is white, evidenced by a white hand flashing by the screen at 21 seconds in. Nonetheless, I believe this man is indeed blacker than the President.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7cqOEr_yfak

    ReplyDelete
  14. SIG II ~
    I'd wanted to post a review of 'The Creature From Jekyll Island' for awhile, but I didn't want to post "just another" review recommendation. So I waited until I had an idea that would make my review seem unique, stand out.

    I guess it worked because it was quickly moved into the Amazon.com ‘spotlight’ position and has received a lot of positive votes. (Leave it to a stock market man like you to actually crunch the numbers and come up with a percentage.) I’m only sorry that my review is helping BigBitch.com to make mo’ money.

    Glad you bought yours from B&N instead. (Did you read it? If so, what did ya think of it?)

    ~ D-FensDogg
    ‘Loyal American Underground’

    ReplyDelete
  15. SHEBOYGANBOY VI ~
    Well, first of all, ALL OF MY FRIENDS ARE "WINNERS"!

    The first video knocked me for a row-a lib-labs! (That's old 'League Of Soul Crusaders' lingo.) But was that "Fat Guy" Blacker than the prez? Hell, I don't even know if he was "gayer" than the prez.

    >> . . . the next video ... I believe the person is white, evidenced by a white hand flashing by the screen at 21 seconds in. Nonetheless, I believe this man is indeed blacker than the President.

    Yep, I think he's White too, for the reason you mentioned... PLUS, at the beginning of the video you see a White kid just walking away from the cameraman. The kid is so close to the cameraman/narrator on an otherwise empty beach, that he MUST be associated with (related to?) the cameraman/narrator.

    That video is HYSTERICALLY FUNNY! I watched it 3 times (twice alone and once with Nappy) and I was howlin' (like Wolfman Jack)!

    Furthermo', that White boy DEFINITELY BE BLACKER THAN THE PREZ! (I think his dog be Blacker than the prez, too.)

    DING!-DING!-DING!
    WINNER!

    When he says, "Oh, shit, dog!" I'm literally IN TEARS from laughter. (Just thinkin' about it now, as I type this, I'm laughin' out loud.)

    He says his dog is "meditatin'" and then... what Lonnie calls "meditatin'" the rest of the world calls "shittin'."

    And at first, Lonnie be all concerned 'bout the dog gettin' his paws wet. Seemed pretty trivial, really, after the dog later laid down on his own poop! HA!-HA!-HA! Oh, man! "Oh, shit, dog!"

    * * *

    You people done posted some damn funny videos! I thank y'all!

    In my opinion, the game show 'WHO BE BLACKER THAN THE PREZ?' should go viral. But since I be the originator of it, I know it won't. Nevertheless, all y'all gave me some great laughs! Thanks again.

    ~ Stephen

    ReplyDelete
  16. "(Did you read it? If so, what did ya think of it?)".

    That book was high on my Christmas list, couldn't wait to get it. After reading Section II, A Crash Course on Money, I took a detour to study some of the major economic theories. The detour turned out to be a long and winding road.

    I'll hold my review until I read it cover to cover. But first I got a hankerin' to watch American Graffiti for some reason. I don't think I've watched that movie "cover to cover" either for some reason. What a cast. Do you think it's a great movie or does it just remind you of that 14 year- old kid back in L.A.?

    SigToo

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  17. SUPER-SIG ALSO ~
    Well, Brother, whenever you do get back to reading Griffin's 'THE CREATURE FROM JEKYLL ISLAND', to refresh your memory a little bit, I would encourage you to re-read 'The Name Of The Game Is Bailout' (from section I) and 'The Mandrake System' (from section II) before launching into the previously unread portions of the book.

    Re-read 'The Name Of The Game Is Bailout' because, as our current Democrat president and our former Republican president have clearly demonstrated, the name of the game IS Bailout. (Well, actually, the name of the game is 'Who Be Blacker Than The Prez?', but I may be mixing up apples and assholes.)

    And I'd recommend you refresh your memory on the portion titled 'The Mandrake System' because I saw Griffin interviewed within the last year and he stated that he felt THAT particular chapter was probably the most important one in his book.

    Now, about 'AMERICAN GRAFFITI' . . .

    I think it's a GREAT movie, man! It wouldn't make my Top 10 movie list, but I'd have to find a way to fit it onto my Top 25 list!

    I first saw it on a cable movie channel when the first cable movie channel was brand new in the L.A. area (my Pa sold subscriptions to it at that time).

    I loved the movie back then and watched it over and over again (because at that time, there were probably only about 12 to 15 movies that were playing on the cable movie channel, and they kept recycling them over and over again).

    But as the decades have gone on, I've come to appreciate ‘American Graffiti’ more and more and more. You DEFINITELY NEED to see the whole thing from "cover to cover".

    There are still a number of lines from that movie that Nappy and I use regularly in our day-to-day discussions. Things like:

    "Oh, no. Not ol' Carol!"

    "You're just like the Lone Ranger!"
    "Yeah, yeah."

    "Girls don't pay; GUYS pay!"

    And the whole damn scene where the under-aged Toad tries to get booze ("hard stuff") from the liquor store is a FRIGGIN' CLASSIC, and that scene ALONE is worth renting the movie for!

    And speaking of ‘Toad’ . . . I once met Charles Martin Smith, the actor who played ‘Toad’. He was working on a sequel to the movie ‘Herbie The Love Bug’ and I was on the set as an Extra. I started yakking with him about ‘American Graffiti’, except that, surprisingly, I was asking him questions about the sequel, ‘More American Graffiti’. Questions like, “Where did you shoot those Vietnam War scenes?”, etc.

    My opinion about ‘More American Graffiti’ - the sequel to ‘American Graffiti’ - can be found on THIS DUDE’S ‘AMERICAN GRAFFITI’ BLOG. [Yeah, a click on that will take ya there, Bro.]

    Please let me know what you think of ‘American Graffiti’ after you’ve seen it “cover to cover”. (Hell, I’m-a go right now and put the CD soundtrack on my player and TURN IT UP LOUD!)

    ~ D-FensDogg
    ‘Loyal American Underground’

    ReplyDelete
  18. I've got "Creature" lined up in the queue for a complete read-through this time, emphasis on "Bailout" and "Mandrake".

    I'm not sure if you saw Bill Still's "The Secret of Oz." It's kind of an interesting history on the central banks' stranglehold on the money supply. The main point repeated throughout is that "it's not what backs the money, it's who controls its quantity." Bill Still explains how L Frank Baum's original "Wizard of Oz' was really a story about the fight against central banks.

    I think the hour and fifty minute long video is a good primer, at the very least, on a topic that many people don't think they can comprehend.
    The Secret of Oz

    I can't understand why my memory is so "spotty" when trying to recollect American Graffiti. My eyes were watching but my brain must have been disconnected for some reason. I'll blame alcohol for now, and it was several years ago when I "watched" it. I do remember Suzanne Somers.

    Come to think of it, I took this cute blond (not Suzanne Somers...let's just call her...ummm, Jailbait) to see "Top Gun" at the movie theater back in nineteen eighty whatever and can only remember Tom Cruise trying to sing "You've Lost That Loving Feeling". I can only deduce that cute blond girls give me some sort of situation-specific amnesia.

    Not sure if Thanksgiving is celebrated in Arizona, but have a happy holiday anyway.

    SigToo






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  19. SUPER-SIG ALSO ~

    Hey, first . . . A Happy Thanksgiving to you, too, Brother! We do indeed celebrate Thanksgiving here in Airheadzona. In fact, if I find the time later today, I'm going to post a special Thanksgiving Day blog bit here.

    And thanks so much for the link to Bill Still's 'THE SECRET OF OZ'. I had never even heard of it. I once read some article about what was supposedly the "real" meaning cloaked within Frank Baum's book 'Wizard Of Oz' (which, by the way, I have read) but the meanings that were explained in the article did not pertain to Central Banking. I can't remember now what the author said the symbols represented, only that it had to do with social issues of the time.

    Really looking forward to seeing 'THE SECRET OF OZ' (TSOO). I have 4 different "documentaries" lined up now to see - all on my computer. Problem is, I'm about 99.90% more likely to sit down and watch a film on my TV than on my computer monitor. So if I'm ever going to see these 4 movies (now including TSOO), I should probably look to see if they can be rented or purchased online.

    >> . . . My eyes were watching but my brain must have been disconnected for some reason. I'll blame alcohol for now

    That excuse has ALWAYS worked well for me. (It's also ALWAYS been the truth.)

    >> . . . I do remember Suzanne Somers.

    Harrison Ford also had a small part in the movie. Granted, Suzanne was was the better looking of the two though.

    >> . . . I can only deduce that cute blond girls give me some sort of situation-specific amnesia.

    Ha!-Ha!
    For me it's more of a brunette thang, but same effect.

    Eat too much, drink too much, unbutton and unzip the top part of yer pants and... sleep it off. It's just "The American Way".

    ~ D-FensDogg
    'Loyal American Underground'

    ReplyDelete

  20. I thought about commenting on this the other day. But than I figured out it's all to easy.


    Br'er Marc

    ReplyDelete

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