THE TRUTH ABOUT TRUTH:

All truth passes through three stages.
First, it is ridiculed.
Second, it is violently opposed.
Third, it is accepted as being self-evident.



Monday, May 27, 2013

SHITTY CITY, AIRHEADZONA (Or, PHUCK PHOENIX!)


Here I sit listening to the Miles Davis classic ‘KIND OF BLUE’ (because I am). Before I get started on my anti-Phoenix rant, this being Memorial Day, I want to first make mention of all the servicemen that the U.S. government knowingly left behind as prisoners in Asian countries after the Korean and Vietnam Wars (or, “police actions”, to be more accurate).

Some of us will always remember them:
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[Read the books ‘AN ENORMOUS CRIME: The Definitive Account Of American POWs Abandoned In Southeast Asia’ and ‘THE POLITICIAN: A Look At The Political Forces That Propelled Dwight David Eisenhower Into The Presidency’.]

Alright, and now on to the rant...

Many times on my blogs I have related to you how utterly stupid the majority of Airheadzonans are – both the poor, dumb bastards who live here, and the assclowns who infest the local government. (Of course the dumb bastards always get the assclowns they deserve.) Bear in mind that Janet Napolitano, the lezbo in charge of Homeland Security, was a former governor of Airheadzona.

I have told you about “Airheadzonan” stupidity time and time again, like HERE, and HERE, and HERE.
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Well, at “rush hour” on Friday, May 24th, the assclowns struck again, and in a way that few American citizens in major metropolitan areas outside of Phoenix could imagine.

Sadly, a Phoenix fireman was recently killed. Here’s what happened: 

PHOENIX -- A Phoenix firefighter has died after being pinned between two emergency vehicles while responding to a fire.

According to officials, Bradley Harper, 23, got caught between an ambulance and a fire truck as the two were trying to pass each other on a narrow road.

The crews were responding to a mulch fire at a business in southwest Phoenix at 39th Ave. and Lower Buckeye Rd. around 5:30 p.m. Saturday. 

I am sincerely sorry that Brad Harper lost his life and my sympathy goes out to his family and friends. I myself lost too many friends at way too young an age, so I can definitely understand the pain.

The accident that took Harper’s life was unfortunate. Apparently it was also an act of carelessness. I wasn’t there, so I can’t say exactly how it occurred but... the description above leads me to the conclusion that some Airheadzonans were acting like Airheadzonans.

Last Friday, a funeral procession was conducted by the Phoenix Fire Department in conjunction with the Phoenix Police Department (also known as “The Gristleheads In Blue”). Below is what they decided to do, as reported HERE:
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BRAD HARPER FUNERAL PROCESSION ROUTE FROM THE CHURCH TO THE CEMETERY 

The procession will leave the church and go east on Happy Valley Road to 67th Ave.

South on 67th. Ave. to the Loop 101

East on the 101 to the I-17 transition

South on I-17 to the McDowell Off-ramp

West on McDowell to 27th Avenue

South on 27th Avenue to the entrance (under the extended Ladder-trucks) into the cemetery on the East side of 27th. Ave. 

ADDITIONAL ROADWAY RESTRICTIONS 

A Hard-closure will occur at 1545 hours on the westbound side of Van Buren, starting at the East-side of the freeway overpass to 27th. Ave, during the graveside ceremony.

A Hard-closure will also occur on McDowell Westbound, starting at the East-side of the freeway overpass to 27th. Ave, only during procession movement. 

MEDIA STAGING 

Media will stage at the Christ's Church of the Valley on an elevated area directly South & East of the main entrance doors. [...] Bottled water will be provided.

Media will stage at Greenwood Memorial Cemetery between 24th and 25th Avenues on Van Buren in predesignated area just inside the West gate. All media vehicles will be staged on Van Buren (Just West of the metal fence on the North side of Van Buren). [...] Bottled water will be provided. 

CEREMONIES 

Funeral at 2:30 p.m. on Friday, May 24 at Christ's Church of the Valley (CCV)
7007 W. Happy
Valley Road
Peoria, AZ  85383


Internment to follow at Greenwood Memorial Cemetery
719 N. 27th Avenue
Phoenix, AZ  85009
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You got that? In other words, what the assclowns did was close down approximately 20 essential freeway miles during “rush hour” on the Friday before the Memorial Day weekend! Why couldn’t this event have waited until the following morning or afternoon – a Saturday when a significant amount of Airheadzonans would be gone from the shitty city to celebrate the holiday?

Why did so many commuters just trying to get home from work on the Friday before a major 3-day weekend need to be diverted off the freeways and crammed into crawling, bumper-to-bumper residential streets?

Is it because the people who run this shitty city are as dumb as a box of rocks? Or was it so that we, the common men, couldn’t possibly miss the outpouring of love that the Fire Department and the “Gristleheads In Blue” have for one of their own? Was it simple stupidity, because no one was smart enough to suggest closing the freeways on Saturday instead? Or were we citizens MEANT to be inconvenienced in order to make certain we didn’t miss the great display of “uniformed support”?

If New York City is a tall, powerful beast...
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...and Los Angeles is a sleek, creatively acrobatic entertainer,
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...then Phoenix, Airheadzona, is a crazy Chihuahua; an overheated, flea and tick infested, little dog suffering from “the heartbreak of psoriasis” :
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"BUT IT'S A DRY HEAT"
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Honestly, you pretty much have to be a straw-for-brains Mike Broomhead (radio station KFYI) to love Phoenix, Airheadzona, and I rue the day I moved to this total hellhole! If Phoenix was a copier/fax machine, I’d beat it like I stole it:
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~ Stephen T. McCarthy

YE OLDE COMMENT POLICY: All comments, pro and con, are welcome. However, ad hominem attacks and disrespectful epithets will not be tolerated (read: "posted"). After all, this isn’t Amazon.com, so I don’t have to put up with that kind of bovine excrement.

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17 comments:

  1. On the Plane. No hassles. Leaving shortly. I'll text from Miami.

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  2. You know, you kinda sound like you're not enjoying the place...

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    1. Oh, no, BROTHER MARTIN, you're misreading me. How did you ever come to that conclusion?

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

      Delete
  3. Stephen-

    I was headed south from my house on 59th Avenue to my usual watering hole at about 5 pm (I worked from home on Friday) and wondered why it took me a half hour to get through the 101 intersection.

    I assumed it was a horrific accident.

    While I do not share your loathing for all things Airheadzonan, one thing I absolutely agree with you on in the stup-f#@king-idity (profanity necessary for emphasis here) of the police and city services when it comes to traffic restrictions.

    I told you about the time they made every car leaving a Rush concert go out one exit because they were looking for a shooting suspect....OK, reasonable even though it took two hours to clear the parking lot....except every car in AZ has dark tinted windows and it was after midnight when the show let out and they did not ask ONE person to roll their windows down...so the killer could have been in anyone's back seat.

    And Friday's example-on a weekend where half the city gets out of town, they block off half of the perimeter freeways just when everyone is trying to get out of town.

    Idjits!

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  4. I almost forgot....

    I do not pay much attention to the media, so while I was aware that a fireman was killed, I did not know how until reading your post.

    I'm with you on this as well-it is a tragedy that this guy died, but this is not a hero's death.

    The fact that the entire city was inconvenienced because two idiots (drivers) do not know how to yield, and another one somehow got between two moving vehicles (that could be considered stupid and irresponsible) is typical of AZ.

    They'll probably rename the Squaw Peak after this guy....

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  5. Here is the story I saw when this happened:

    Phoenix lost two first-responders Sunday as a firefighter who was wounded in a mulch fire died from his injuries and a police officer was killed in a hit-and-run incident in west Phoenix, authorities said.

    When I went back to read the whole story, it talks about him being pinned between two vehicles.

    I have nothing but sympathy for his family, but no fair on that synopsis.

    This event is a lot closer to texting and driving than it is to charging up the stairs of one of the WTC towers.

    LC

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    1. LC ~
      There isn't much I can add to what you've written here. A young man died due to "Airheadzonaism" and the Fire and Police (Gristlehead) Departments compounded it with another act of "Airheadzonaism" that inconvenienced an awful lot of people during "rush hours" on a Friday before a major 3-day holiday. But the "City Fathers", the Fire Department and the "Gristleheads In Blue" don't give a sh#t.

      Only here, man! One of the biggest cities in the country but they're all still running around acting like this is tiny Bumphuk, Iowa, where you can close down Main Street to have a parade. Maroons!!!

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

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  6. Oh man, the hilarity of your comment above to DiscConnected... I didn't even notice it until I was almost done typing this comment. See, this story reminds me of the terrible parades we used to have in the tiny hometown (Bumphuk, Colorado) that Brandon and I were both raised in.

    So every year they had this awful, lame "hometown pride parade", and our city always had the bright idea to have it start from one edge of town to another, running down the entire length of Main Street. Now here's the problem with that picture - our town is one of those small cowtowns that only HAS a Main Street. So yes, that's right, for 6-7 hours the only road leading in or out of our town was completely shut down. Also, the only road leading to any of our damn houses was shut down. So if you wanted to go somewhere, come home, etc, good luck trying! But see, for being a cowtown, it's not THAT small. At the time it had a population of about 15,000 people. Now it's double. So imagine how much chaos was created by shutting down a town of 15,000 people for almost the entire day. And all of this for a hoaky parade that maybe 500-1000 would attend.

    Oh, and get this, they also loved to block off certain neighboring streets so that people couldn't park there, and there would be huge barriers in the street along with police officers to enforce it. For some reason they would always do this to my street in particular, and try to enforce it just when I was driving home, some 3-4 hours before the parade even started.

    Me, trying to drive home after morning college classes.
    Police officer: "Son, this block is closed. You have to park somewhere else."
    Me: "Yeah, that's my house right there." (points to house less than 50 feet away) "And I'm going home. You can check my ID if you want to confirm that."
    Police officer: "Well, see, this road is closed, so you're gonna have to go somewhere else."
    Me: "Super. So I'm gonna go ahead and drive home, and if you want to write me a ticket or something, you can do it in my driveway."

    I drove around him, and he did not follow me to give me that ticket.

    The point of this comment? I do not miss living in that awful town.

    You think Airheadzona is bad, but just remember, we're famous for spending $2 million on a double roundabout that the mayor thought was a brilliant idea for our busiest up-and-coming intersection, rather than just upgrading from a 4 way stop to a stoplight. To this day that roundabout has created more confusion and more traffic backups and accidents than anything else in the entire city. Asking rednecks to drive like the Brits do is just asking WAY too much...

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    1. 4-B ~
      Entertaining comment, as always. My reply (with morning coffee) before work tomorrow... uh... later THIS morning, I mean.

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

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    2. BROTHER BEER BOY BRYAN ~

      >>... Bumphuk, Colorado

      Ha!-Ha! Well, you are entirely right that there are Bumphuks everywhere. When I originally came up with that expression, like, circa 1981, it was "Bumphuk, Idaho". I later adjusted it to "Bumphuk, Iowa', because according to my own experiences, Iowa seemed even more Bumphuky than Idaho did. Nevertheless, there are Bumphuks in EVERY state.

      I’ve driven through Bumphuk, California; Bumphuk, South Dakota; Bumphuk, Illinois; Bumphuk, Georgia. I've even driven through Bumphuk, Colorado - it may not have been YOUR Bumphuk, Colorado, Bryan, but it was SOMEONE'S Bumphuk, Colorado. Heck, in the early 1990s, I even lived in Bumphuk, Airheadzona.

      >>… that Brandon and I were both raised in.

      I think it’s so cool that you and Brandon are still such good friends after so long a time. When did you two first meet? High school, middle school, or even before that? (I’ll bet you guys could come up with a funny blog bit recapping how you two first got to know each other.)

      Good for you standing up to the Bumphuk police officer – little dictator wannabes that most of ‘em are. However, had that been a Phoenix cop, he probably WOULD have cited you in your own driveway. They do not take kindly to being disobeyed. Who the hell do you think you are, Beer Boy, to ignore a direct order?!

      >>... You think Airheadzona is bad,...

      Actually, I KNOW Airheadzona is bad. How does a Phoenix man know he’s died and gone to hell? A little demon approaches him and says, “Alright, Bub, hand over the sunglasses.”

      >>... that roundabout has created more confusion and more traffic backups and accidents than anything else in the entire city. Asking rednecks to drive like the Brits do is just asking WAY too much...

      I can believe that! Roundabouts are bad news, period. We have a few of them here in Phoenix too, and putting something like THAT in the way of Airheadzonans, who can’t think quickly to begin with... it’s just begging for accidents. (Maybe that’s secretly the goal?)

      The Roundabouts probably force the Airheadzonan drivers to slow down. Now THAT’S a scary thought: An Airheadzonan driving even slower than usual.

      These people here... I’d like to say that their brains have been baked by the heat, except that everyone is required to turn in their brain at the border. The signs read: “Welcome To Arizona! No brains allowed. Enjoy your stay.”

      ~ D-FensDogg
      ‘Loyal American Underground’

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    3. Roundabouts. In Ft Wayne, we call that an "Idiot Circle".

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  7. First, I've only ever been involved in a funeral of this magnitude once, but even in a corrupt city, they know better than to shut down the Interstates. Not to mention that it gets nowhere near the attention or sympathy they are looking for. No sense irritating people more than necessary.

    Second, you going on about Bumphuk USA. I have to take exception to that, since I've lived in most of those places.

    Finally, roundabouts - don't even get me started. There is one enormous one here that scares the carp outta me. Course, everybody is driving on the wrong side of the road anyway, so it's an interesting exercise just going down the road. Life in the left lane was a whole lot easier.

    Did all of that make sense? It's late and I'm tired, so maybe not. Oh well, you know me.

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    1. NITRO (or, FAE) ~

      >>... you going on about Bumphuk USA. I have to take exception to that, since I've lived in most of those places.

      You have my sympathy.
      But... are you trying to start a 'Word War' with me? If so, bear in mind that no one has won one yet.

      >>... Finally, roundabouts - don't even get me started. There is one enormous one here that scares the carp outta me.

      Really? I don't recall any roundabouts thereabouts. It must be relatively new. (Where is it?)

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

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  8. Remember when those firefighters up in Yarnell were killed in the fire? 19 firefighters died. When the firefighters were returned to their respective cities for burial, the ENTIRE freeway system in Phoenix was a mess! Idiots on the opposite side of the freeway just stopped their vehicles to watch the procession. That's right, everybody just stopped their cars, their trucks on the FREEWAY. I'm not talking about pulling over to the side, oh no no, these morons just came to a complete stop in EVERY FREAKIN lane!!

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    1. ANON ~
      Thankfully, I was not on the freeways at that time, and this is actually the first I've heard about this (the freeway fiasco, I mean - not the Yarnell firefighters dying). But it does NOT surprise me in the least!

      I drive professionally for a living, and EVERY SINGLE FLIPPIN' DAY I encounter more "roadtardation" than most people could even imagine. Not a day goes by that I'm not forced to honk my horn at several different morons behind a wheel.

      This city has got to have more under-100 I.Q. individuals than any other major city in America. It's a wonder that the 'dumb' hasn't rubbed off on me yet. Phoenix is really hell, and anyone who would even consider moving here should have their head examined... and then filled with lead.

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

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  9. Yes, Stephen, you are right. I remember that day with the funeral procession. Oh man! Watching the news and seeing these idjits just stopping on the freakin freeway. I had a friend on his way home from work almost collided with one of these tardballs just sitting there smack dab in the middle lane! I work for the shitty city of phoenix. These phuktards keep me part time and without benefits of all kinds. Believe me, when I eventually have more money saved, I plan on vacating this grease stain dump asap!

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    1. Hear!-Hear! I am of the same frame of mind. The ONLY thing keeping me in Shitty City, Airheadzona, is that I don't have the necessary funds to make the move to the place I intend to go. But right now, I am attempting to save up the money, and as soon as I have it, Shitty City will be disappearing from my rear view mirror as fast as I can make it go.

      "UNCLE!" I've had more than enough!

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

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