Friday, November 14, 2014

'ONE FOR MY BABY AND ONE MORE FOR THE ROAD' (Or, 'TWO')

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DOBERMEN & POODLE SKIRTS ~

Granted, today's barking does not include a bar that I've not been in before...

'Drunken Donuts Drive-Thru'

'C.O.P.S. - Coproaches Overseeing Police State'

'C.O.P.S. : Corrupt Officers "Protecting & Serving"

'They Can Put A Man On The Moon But They Can't Put A Man On The Moon - Part 2'

'They Can Put A Man On The Moon But They Can't Put A Man On The Moon - Part 1'

... but I figured I'd howl about 'em again, since I am the barking bar king!

Yesterday was a day off from work that got completely flushed down the toilet thanks to Airheadzona government folks.

You see, I had to report for possible jury duty. I figured at most I'd be downtown at the courthouse for two hours or three. Foolish me! I'd forgotten that this is Phoenix, Airheadzona, where everyone's slower than a Chicano cruisin' in a Chevy Impala.

"GUILTY!  Thank  you,  that  is  all."

I, along with about 70 other poor bastards, was called in to be interviewed as a prospective juror and was shocked to learn that half of our group had been there the day earlier, and the judge and attorneys were still only in the "general questions" phase of selecting a jury!

When the question was asked, "Would anyone tend to disbelieve a police officer's testimony on the stand due to the fact that the witness was an officer of the law?" I was honest. I was also the only one to raise my hand (which indicated "Yes" to the judge). At that point, the prosecuting attorney knew for an absolute fact that he was not going to allow me to be seated on this jury.

Other than myself, there were several other prospective jurors there who will definitely be dismissed from this trial for one reason or another (i.e., law enforcement work, legal work, etc.) You'd think that the lawyers would thin out the ranks now, since some of us have a less than zero chance of sitting on this jury. Yes, that's what you'd think. Did I mention that this is in Phoenix, Airheadzona?

Then the individual interviewing process began. When they were only interviewing #14 after about an hour and a half, and there was only another hour before the close of the court's operating hours, you'd think they would allow the back half of the group to leave for the day, to get on the road before the worst rush-hour traffic began, right? Airheadzona.

Also, the process would be faster if they didn't stop for a 90-minute lunch break! Who the hell needs an hour and a half to eat lunch?

I did go to lunch at ALICE COOPERSTOWN, where I got to see a guitar owned by Eric Clapton, a bong owned by Sting, and the bra never worn by Janis Joplin.

So, nearly all of us (except for a few of those lucky bastards who got their individual interviews yesterday and were dismissed) are due to return one day next week - on one of my days off from work again, of course! - for further questioning. This means that some of these people will be on DAY THREE for this one stinking case and are STILL not on the jury or dismissed! This is unbelievable ineptitude.

Ninety-nine percent of cops give the rest a bad name. But even if I didn't automatically distrust most cops, I'd still have a hard time believing this defendant is guilty: They say he attempted to elude the police in a stolen police car. But frankly, this illegal alien doesn't look "fast" enough to elude a sleeping dog with four short legs, one eye, and a broken nose. I suspect the cops planted the stolen police car on him.

Just kidding. I made all that up because I'm not allowed to tell anyone what this prostitution-related case is about. ...Oops. ...Well, I've said too much. (...So I might as well add that I suspect the cops planted the prostitute on the man.)

It was Brother Beer Boy Bryan Bodyguard Betty (6-B) who turned me onto the following video by Law Professor James Duane. Hokey-Smoke! If this guy's mouth was a race car it would win every NASCAR-sponsored event! He can't talk fifty-five! You will watch this video if you're smarter'n an Airheadzonan:

'DON'T TALK TO THE POLICE'
James Duane is a Professor at Regent Law School
in Virginia Beach, Virginia



https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d-7o9xYp7eE

I have nuttin' but respect for our justice system.

AND NOW, ONE FOR THE ROAD... ER--
ONE FOR THE SPACE FLIGHT:




'WHAT HAPPENED ON THE MOON?' 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W79mIGx9Ib4

Hoo-Wee! Color me "impressed" by Jack White's NASA photography analysis...

Link:  'The Skeleton In NASA's Spacesuit' by Jack White

http://web.archive.org/web/20060517052815/http:/www.aulis.com/skeleton.html

Link: Jack White's Apollo Studies – Index 1

http://www.aulis.com/jackstudies_index1.html


HOUSTON, WE HAS A PROBLEMS!

MOON  LANDING  MY  EYE!

HAVANA HARD TIME BELIEVING
ANYTHING UNCLE S(C)AM SAYS.

~ Stephen T. McCarthy

YE OLDE COMMENT POLICY: All comments, pro and con, are welcome. However, ad hominem attacks and disrespectful epithets will not be tolerated (read: "posted"). After all, this isn’t Amazon.com, so I don’t have to put up with that kind of bovine excrement.

15 comments:

  1. Stephen, dear Stephen:

    Upon your arrival at the ARIDzona court house, I would assume they would immediately recognize your intelligence and honesty and hot glue you to a jury box.

    One question I always have in these jury selection is why don't they let the extremely prejudiced, anti-common sensible and ex-law enforcement sit on a jury? It's supposed to be a jury of our peers and THEY WALK AMONG US. I see potential for slick interviewees to populate the jury box, with their "dress for court" mentality and fence sitting ways.

    I ain't about that life.

    Go back and give it another go - take a tent and sleeping bag. Wait 'em out.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. CHERDO ~
      I thank you for the compliment, but...

      ...if I were smarter'n an Airheadzonan...

      ...I would have figured out a way to get outta jury duty WITHOUT having to appear at the courthouse!

      FUN FACT: The LAST thing I wanna do is get seated on the jury. No tent and sleeping bag 4 me!

      I've been served to serve a few times. The closest I got was serving as an Alternate Juror in a criminal case in Los Angeles County circa "early 1980s" - when I was so drunk most of the time that it was like me in 2014.

      I'll try to tell you how that worked out in a later comment. (Clue: It soured me on jury duty, and I never even "in-putted" any input.)

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

      Delete
  2. Wow. I can't believe they didn't send you home immediately. Seems like an incredible waste of time. Why ask the question if you have zero intention of acting on it? Then again, maybe they decided (since you raised your hand) to haze you mercilessly and make your life miserable. I mean, who doesn't believe EVERYTHING a police officer says? If you don't... we'll make you pay for that with your TIME.

    Great video. Excellent reminder for an INNOCENT person to keep their trap shut. Talking CANNOT help you. Wowza.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. G.W. ~
      Yeah, I would have wondered if perhaps they were keeping me around as punishment for distrusting cops from the get-go. But the fact that they've also held on to a former cop and a lawyer too (both who will also be dismissed - eventually) leads me to believe it's just ineptitude rather than spite.

      How about that picture of the Lunar Module? You do realize, don't you, that's a photo of THE REAL THING they want us to believe flew through space to the Moon and back!

      Yeah, I was born... BUT NOT YESTERDAY!

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

      Delete
  3. I've been called in twice this year--once downtown L.A. and the most recent time in Compton. Didn't get called for interviewing in L.A. but about 80 of us were there for the entire day getting dismissed at almost 5 PM. To me that is absolute incompetence. What a waste of all of these people's time and transportation. Surely they have a better way of doing this.

    Most recently when I went to Compton I got put into an interview pool. They didn't get around to talking to me until the 2nd day. 2 wasted days in Compton with no interesting places to go nearby.

    When my group went before the court, I raised my hand for just about everything. I got lectured by the judge about justice, or fairness, or whatever such crap she was trying to feed me. The only nice thing was that the judge was kind of attractive and pleasant in demeanor.

    This trial was one where one gang member was charged with murdering another gang member. Probably one of the key things that got me booted out was when I said that I thought all gang members deserved to be put in prison and even if they were innocent of the crime they were on trial for they probably had done something else that they deserved to be incarcerated for. Oh, and I said I despised tagging. Apparently the murder had something to do with two rival tagging crews. What a waste of taxpayer money.

    Anyway, no jury service for me this year and if they call me again I'll think of something else to make me look like a bad juror. Now, if they'd pay me where it was worth my while I wouldn't mind serving. But $15 per day? What a joke.

    Lee
    Tossing It Out

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. We get only $12. a day (plus 40 cents a mile), but at least they can't call us in more than once every 18 months.

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

      Delete
  4. One time they sent me a mail in questionaire. I listed my dwarf hamster as a dependant.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. And I'll bet that's how Scrappy lists you! ;-)

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

      Delete
    2. Actually we got a "You must fill this out" questionnaire from the census bureau a couple months ago- I believe it was a "sniff out Obamacare scofflaws" questionnaire- and listed Scrappy right down to last name (Beagle), age, estimated birthday, and education. Bet they'll love that!

      Delete
    3. I know I do.

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

      Delete
  5. Unbelievable. I can't believe Georgia actually does something better than anywhere else in the country.Our county, anyway. I've been called for jury duty numerous times, and found the procedure to be quite efficient. And I (gasp!) actually enjoyed serving as a jiuror. I was fortunate to be serving with a bunch of people with good heads on their shoulders, and we had some good intelligent discussions before reaching our verdict. I'd definitely welcome the opportunity to serve again. (Yeah,I know.I'm weird.) The judge even sent me a nice thank you note afterwards.A good experience all the way around.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. SUSKI ~
      I actually wouldn't mind jury duty, so long as my employer would pay for it in full. As it is, they do pay for up to five days. But I can't afford to miss work, and what if I wound up on some atrocious, month-long A-list case?

      Better for me to play it safe and tell them what I honestly think about the majority of cops.

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

      Delete
  6. I love that "A Trip to the Moon" picture at the bottom. The ridiculousness of that scene always kills me.

    I'm glad to see that clip I sent you making an appearance here. Really, to anyone reading this who hasn't seen the video, it's worth a watch. It's not geared at people who've committed crimes. It's aimed at folks just like you an' me - nice, law abiding people who don't have so much as a parking ticket. But it's worth a watch because being a goody-goody does not equate to a Get Out Of Jail Free card, and even if you plead your complete innocence to a police officer they have ways of spinning it against you to make you look like you're giving unreliable testimony. Hell, as the police officer that speaks after even admits, it's their job.

    So you might recall my jury duty experience from last year, which I posted about. It was a high profile road rage stabbing case that I had never heard about because I don't have TV service... which made me an ideal candidate for the case. Dammit. Go figure, the one time not having TV service is a bad thing!

    It's funny. The amount of waiting that goes into everything is incredible, even if you do serve. You're treated as one big pack, and if one person stops, everyone stops. One lady had the bladder of a 2 year old child and needed pee breaks like I need beer breaks. Another guy was at least 100 years old and needed the people on the stand to repeat themselves constantly because he couldn't hear. Also, deliberation, which should have taken all of 10 minutes (open and shut case), ended up taking 2 hours.

    I actually had to lay the smack down on my fellow jurors because they were going to give the girl a lesser charge simply because she was a cutesy 21 year old girl who'd just had a baby and she'd "be away from the baby for a long time." Seriously, everyone was contemplating giving her a slap on the wrist because of this and one lone guy was saying, "No, that's not right, the law is the law," but wasn't getting anywhere, so I called attention to myself and laid it out. I reminded them that if she was a big fat tattooed guy with no family you'd throw the books at him. The law is the law, and you don't get to pick whether you give her a lesser charge because she's a cutesy little girl with a baby. That "cutesy little girl" stabbed a mother of two in the face in front of her kids, and if she wanted to be with her baby so damn bad she wouldn't have done that. After putting it that way, we reached a verdict in under 5 minutes. I've never felt so influential.

    Awww yeah! Feminism at work in the justice system, beeotches! (That's how feminism works, right? Equal rights for all?)

    ~6B

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. 6-B ~

      >>... It's not geared at people who've committed crimes. It's aimed at folks just like you an' me - nice, law abiding people...

      Hmmm... I hope you didn't have ME in mind while you were writing that. I break some law just about every single day. In fact, if I didn't, I think I would need to commit suicide... which is against the law, although no one who ever does it gets prosecuted.

      >>... Go figure, the one time not having TV service is a bad thing!

      You're right about that. Otherwise, going TV-less is probably a soul-saving lifestyle choice.

      >>... One lady had the bladder of a 2 year old child and needed pee breaks like I need beer breaks.

      Ha! You mean you WEREN'T telling the judge every 12 ounces-- er, I mean, every 15 minutes... you weren't telling the judge you needed a beer break? (At worst, it might have gotten you out of jury duty.)

      OK, this little story is for you and Cherdo...

      The one time I was seated on a jury I was an "alternate" juror, but I needed to pay as much attention as anyone else, just in case one of the 12 got sick, or died, or died and got sick.

      During the jury selection process there was one young woman who was dumber than a pet rock. Every basic question she was asked had to be rephrased 2 or 3 times until she could understand it and answer it. She was an airline stewardess. No, she wasn't blonde, but I can only imagine how dumb she'd have been if she had been blonde... and a cheerleader.

      So, after listening to testimony for 3 or 4 days, the jury goes to deliberate and my services weren't needed.

      When they returned, it was a hung jury. And I'm thinking: "WHA'?! How the hell could it have resulted in a hung jury? Beyond any reasonable doubt, that defendant was guilty as sin! I couldn't believe it, and I was dying to know what had been said in that jury room".

      Well, not long later there was an article in the local newspaper about the trial and how it had turned out. In the article, it said that all the jurors felt the guy on trial was guilty. All the jurors except one, that is. And the one juror who thought differently - ta-da! - worked for one of the airlines.

      It made total sense that the defense attorney would want her on the jury, but I can't believe the prosecutor didn't dismiss her. That blunder cost him the whole trial.

      And that experience left a bad taste in my mind. If you're ever selected again for jury duty, believe me, the LAST thing you want is to be an "alternate juror".

      ~ D-FensDogg
      'Loyal American Underground'

      Delete
    2. >dumber than a pet rock

      Hey, hold on there-I was able to teach my pet rock to "stay."

      Delete

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